28 Jan: Tuesday Turdfest!

So...I'm working from home today, and looking forward to good morning poo. And that's exactly what I got. I kind of cheated yesterday and ate carbs. Had a cheeseburger for lunch (but no fries!) and a hot dog and popcorn last evening at the movie theater. But that was enough to make for a significant poo this morning! I don't crap this much on regular cheat days!

 

And as always, this came out in one big SLOORP! No straining, no grunting, just slid right out. Really quite a nice experience. (I don't remember EVER being constipated. And then I hear these guys on the toilet next to me at work hacking and groaning away. Make me wonder why they all seem to be so plugged up.)

 

eNjoy!

 

27 Jan: Messy Monday.

I crapped twice today....once at 5am and again at 8am. Pretty messy, mostly liquid both times. Sorry they're not better looking. Looks like it's going to be one of those weeks.

eNjoy.

26 Jan: Sunday surprise second ploop!

I went out to eat Sunday brunch, and I drank a couple of Bloody Marys. Then, later on, at the Home Depot, I got those familiar rumblings. I sped home, and, happily, gave birth to a second bouncing baby poo! Not particularly pooagenic, but you can't have everything!

eNjoy!

26 Jan: Sunday Ploop.

So I got up this fine Sunday morning and I was expecting to have my customary cup of coffee. But, as it turns out, I had to crap BEFORE I had my cup of coffee. Yep, I had to shuffle right into my bathroom to poo.

And what we have here is a fairly soft ploop. Not my best effort. But, hey, my ass dictated the poo. Not my fault. :)

eNjoy.

25 Jan: Saturday chunks.

So...I'm at home Saturday morning, looking forward to the weekend, and I realize--it's time to poo. I LOVE TO POO! Maybe you already figured that out. I LOVE TO POO. A really good poo is almost a religious experience.

 

So I had a good poo. Nice solid chunks. Not the log I shit on Thursday. Or the block I shit yesterday. But still respectable. And because I cheated yesterday, and will binge on carbs today--there's a good chance I will poo again today! Woo HOO! And if I do, you know I will post it right here!

 

eNjoy!

 

24 Jan: Friday block.

So...I took this picture at work--a regular morning poo. It is a nice blocky poo. Didn't feel that much difference coming out of my ass. I did finally figure out the angle to avoid the overhead glare of the fluorescent lighting. Makes for much better pictures.

 

eNjoy. 

 

23 Jan: Thursday log.

 So, I'm at work...and I have my regular morning coffee, and I feel those familiar rumblings. So I affix the post it note in front of the light sensor (so the toilet doesn't automatically flush when I stand up to take the picture) and I sit down for a nice poo. And poo I did. A nice solid log. My poos aren't normally like this--as the readers of this blog surely know.

 

I hadn't quite figured out the lighting to avoid the glare of the overhead light, but still a fairly good representation of a nice, solid poo,

 

eNjoy.

 

22 Jan: Snow day skinny poo!

Well, it snowed yesterday...about 6 inches. When I woke up this morning, it was 8°F. That's cold. I think that's like  -14°C. Bone chilling cold. And why would I want to go out on that cold? So I decided to work from home today. So I had a cup of coffee, and then had nice poo. And my poo was rather--skinny. A skinny, snow day poo. I also included a picture of the snow on my deck.

eNjoy.

21 Jan: More cat poo.

So, we discovered more cat poo, because the cat's litter boxes were behind a closed door. This time the poo was in an upstairs bathroom. Hidden away in a young lady's shorts. The young lady stated that she works no longer wear the shorts...even if they are washed. Can't say I blame her...

eNjoy.

21 Jan: Tuesday fluffy logpile.

So I wake up this morning, had a cup of coffee, and decided it was time for a nice poo. And poo I did. Pretty standard stuff. I was low carb yesterday, so this poo was unexpected....and appreciated! I call this a fluffy logpile.

eNjoy.

20 Jan: Bonus Cat Poo!

So, we had a guest in our house and he closed the door to the room where the litter boxes are the cats use to do their business. So, for about 4 hours, the cats couldn't get to their litter boxes. I was down in the basement, and I thought "I smell ass." And sure enough, one of the cats had left us a present on the carpet. Not their fault...they couldn't get to their box. Poor kitties.

eNjoy.

20 Jan: Holiday Ordure.

So...I have the day off today...it's a holiday. So I woke up this morning, had a cup of coffee and thought, "it's time for a good poo..."  And poo I did. Although yesterday wasn't technically a cheat day, I do usually end up eating more carbs on Sunday, and that makes for better Monday poos. And below we have a pretty solid turd. Once again, I chose the pic without the flash, because the poos just look better.

19 Jan: Sunday double take.

So, yesterday was my regular cheat, and cheat I did. I ate carbs, and drank carbs. I feasted and farted. And this morning, I took a healthy dumper--as you can see. I took pictures of the poo with my phone: one with flash off and one with the flash on. I decided to post pictures of both, because they look completely different. Almost like different poos. The pic below, with the flash, looks like it's covered in spider webs. The pic at the bottom is without the flash. If you look carefully, you can see the light reflecting off my head, in the reflection off the surface of the water.

 

eNjoy.

 



18 Jan: Fuzzy Saturday Floop!

 SO I took a big crap this morning. BIG crap after cheating with pizza and beer last night (and not pooing yesterday). For some reason my phone took a fuzzy picture. I couldn't get it in focus. I hope this doesn't mean I have to get a new phone. Piss.

 

eNjoy.

 

16 Jan: Rare Two Ploop Thursday!

 So I'm at work, and I sit down for my regular morning crap. That's the picture below. A regular plop. It's ok--it is what it is. So I think I'm done.

 

I go to the gym at lunch (there is a gym in the building where I work). I got on the treadmill to warm up before I lifted weights. And after about 6 minutes on the treadmill, I start to feel the familiar intestinal rumbling. I sit down on the toilet and BRAAAP. Second ploop. Hoorray! Not very pooagenic, kind of soft, as second poos generally are, but it's still a poo.

 

eNjoy.

 

13 Jan: Monday miss!

So, I'm at work, and I'm ready for my regular Monday morning crap. And crap I did! One of those craps that seems like it will go on forever. I had my phone ready, I got up to take the picture, and I saw the crap. It was EPIC. Thin, long, brown, and coiled like a snake. It was the perfect turd. And then the toilet flushed before I could get the shot! I forgot to cover the little sensor with the post-it note (which how I've been defeating the auto-flush feature on the toilets at work).

Perhaps the perfect crap and I missed it. <sigh> Sorry.

15 Jan: Hump day plop.

 So, I didn't poop yesterday. Normal, when I'm trying to stick to my low carb diet. This morning, I got up, drank a cup of coffee, and had to crap. what you see below is a regular poo plop for me. Brown soft, uninspiring. Sorry.

 

eNjoy.

 

12 Jan: Sunday Delayed Poo!

So, I didn't poo on Saturday, which is understandable because I fasted until 6PM that day. I then cheated Saturday night, eating pizza, donuts and drinking beer (watching football). So I was expecting a BIG poo Sunday morning, which is what usually happens after a cheat evening. But that didn't happen. Hmmm.

 

So I cheated again Sunday (as my regular cheat day) and was expecting a big poo anytime. I was in Virginia Beach until about noon, and I was looking at 3 hour drive home. So, it's cheat day--what do you eat? You eat Taco Bell! So I went to Taco Bell and loaded up on favorite cheat foods, including a large (regular full sugar!) "Baja Fresh" Mountain Dew (which I think you can only find at Taco Bell) and Cinnabon "Cinnabon Delights" (four small fried donut pellets filled with Cinnabon frosting--absolutely delicious). Now I thought this could be a problem. I hadn't crapped in a day and half, I was loading up with a huge cheat meal, and I was looking at a 3 hour drive home. I was seriously concerned I was going to stop during the drive and a take a big dumper.

 

Even worse--I was drinking fountain soda, which has acted in the past as a laxative. I drink a regular, full sugar fountain drink, and I'm running to the bathroom 30 minutes later with the squirts. I was really worried that I might have an intestinal emergency while driving, after all of that food and soda.

 

But I did it anyway. I wanted to eat and drink all of that, and I wanted to do it now. If I ended up having to buy new underwear, so be it.

 

But it didn't happen. No emergency. I drove the 3 hours home and nothing happened. No issues. I made it home. 45 minutes after I got home, I crapped. And, as you can see from the picture below, as expected, it was a full load. So it all worked out. It pays to cheat!

 

eNjoy!

10 Jan: Oops.

So, I left my turds in the bowl unflushed. Which is low rent. You should ALWAYS take responsibility for flushing your crap!

So my girlfriend found my turd. She wasn't happy. She said the color had leached from the turd and collected at the bottom of the bowl. Leaving tan husks of their former selves.

Unfortunately she isn't as excitied about taking pictures of turds as am I. So no pics.

Oh well.

10 Jan: Friday Plope.

So, today I had a more or less regular crap. It came out as a soft log. And it was a sinker. When I looked, I thought it was going to be a plop--it felt soft coming out. Then I realized it was more of a rope. So--plop + rope = plope.

 

When I was taking the pictures, I didn't like the way the overhead light reflected in the pics (without the flash, second pic). So I turned off the lights, and used the flash (first pic).

 

Which do you prefer?

 

eNjoy.

 

 

9 Jan: Thursday Lincoln Logs!

So, I didn't crap yesterday. A little strange, because I've been crapping daily for the last month. But as you have seen, my poos have been soft, mostly plops. So I skip a day, and then take a nice solid crap this morning after coffee. And we have serious logs! Just what I like to see!

eNjoy!

7 Jan: Tuesday soup!

 So, Tuesday morning, and my regular poo came out as a gurgly, farty mess. Alas, not very pooagenic. But I decided to snap a pic anyway--because I know that's what my fans demand!

 

Once again, if you look close, you can see the outline of head in the reflected overhead fluorescent lights.

 

eNjoy.

 

6 Jan: Monday Logpile.

So, it's a typical Monday. Started off as a log, finished off as a pile. The pile actually extends outside of the water.

 

If you look close, you can see the outline of my head in the reflection of the overhead fluorescent lights. Ha! When taking a picture of my poo at work, the overhead fluorescent lights are a problem, and as you can tell, the reflection makes it difficult to see some of the poo.

 

eNjoy.

 

5 Jan: Second Sunday Squirt?

So, I went out to eat for lunch. And right before we get our food, I get those familiar rumblings. And I can tell it's going to be messy. So I go to the men's room, and it's right next to the door. The door leads to the 25 degree outside. So the bathroom was cold. The toilet seat was cold. So, I sit down and--BRAAAAP. A bubbly, gurgly noxious mess. Really not very pooagenic.

5 Jan: Sunday Plound?

So, it's the Sunday following a cheat day. For you newbies, that means on Saturday I typically eat or drink anything I want. Which makes for some interesting poos. This one wasn't that interesting. Sorry. Sort of a cross between a plop and a mound. So--we have a "plound." Soft, brown and uninspiring. Once again--sorry. Too soft to make a really good log. <sigh>

 

eNjoy.

 

 

4 Jan: Saturday Plogs!

So today is Saturday. I carbed it up pretty good last night. That's my routine...I fast all of Friday, and then pig out on carbs Friday evening. I also eat and drink anything I want on Saturday. But feasting Friday evening usually makes for a pretty good poo Saturday morning. And this morning didn't disappoint! Nice poo logs....or a "plog." Sinkers and at least one foster. Win/win!

eNjoy.

3 Jan: Rare Friday second Ploop!

So, I'm not quite sure why, but I took a second crap today. Wasn't really carbing it up yesterday, and that's usually when I have a two poop morning. Not really a lot going on...pretty soft, normal (for me) plop.

eNjoy.

3 Jan: Snow day Ploop!

So...it snowed last night. We got about 2 inches....yay. I'm more or less over my cold, and the intestinal problems that have been plaguing me seem to have past. Poo is still kind of soft....kind of a Ploop. So we have a snow day Ploop!

eNjoy.

2 Jan: Finally a more solid poo!

So, as I've said in my last couple of posts, I've been having intestinal distress the last couple of days. This has resulted in poo plops or liquid poo. Not very pooagenic. Today I'm feeling a lot better...and this morning I crapped a more our less solid poo. And I got in there nice and tight so you can see all of the details.

eNjoy.

1 Jan: Tuesday, New Year's Day poo!

Still not feeling quite right in the gut. And my poo is still showing it. I drank a lot last night, and woke up a little hungover. My poo was a plop, and darker than normal. Anyway, see for yourself.

eNjoy.